Hello dear friends.
"God is good, but life's still hard."
This post is gonna get right to the point. I've been going through some real tough stuff in my life and it's taking a toll on my heart. The depression is real, the anxiety is high, and the paranoia is running my thoughts. I'm trying to go the "happiness is a state of mind" route. But I'm not really sure if I even believe that phrase is true. If my happiness was a state of mind, I think I'd be...well... happier. I want happiness. I want joy even more. I want fulfillment. I want to feel full and satisfied in my life. I want my heart to pour over with love and for freedom to show in my life. Because Jesus has set me free from my past. He sets me free from continuous pain because He is the ultimate healer. I am trying so hard to be "happy", but no matter my state of mind, I need to know the state of my heart and soul.
I believe that God can take my life and turn it around. But I need a heart and soul check. My friends, my advice to you and to myself is to find satisfaction and fulfillment in Christ because that's where the true joy can be found. Whether your going through struggles in friendships and relationships, or you are content in your standing with people... Whether you are in a good place of good days, or you can't even get out of bed in the morning because it simply hurts to breathe... Whether you are currently dealing with any form of illness, or you've never felt better in your life... I recommend that you find your fulfillment in things outside of the external values. Find your satisfaction in the presence of the Lord. He is the satisfaction that fills the holes in our hearts. We all have an emptiness that we are longing to fill, and so often we turn to worldly loves and pleasures and excitement to give us a rush and feeling of significance. But there in no greater love than the love our Father in Heaven has for us. There is no greater power than the healing hand of God. There is no greater fulfillment than the overflowing joy that comes with knowing our Savior on a personal level.
I have been so lost the past few days and weeks and basically I've been in a physical and emotional winter season that has taken me into a darkness in my heart. But today, I woke up at 3am. Not only was I wide awake but I was rather content with where I was. I was awake, I was confident in getting better, and I was ready to step into the light. I'm choosing to get better not bitter, as the title says. I will pursue the One who relentlessly pursues me first. He has never stopped providing for me, even in my most barren droughts, he gave me life and breathed breath into my lungs and gave me the courage and power to fight another day, and another day, and another day. I must keep fighting, and I will keep fighting knowing it will get better. Some days I might not believe it, but I'll keep having the "just survive tomorrow" mindset when I am down, until my thoughts are filled with "I can't wait for tomorrow". I can do this, and so can you. We are in this together. Though it is incredibly difficult to maintain an optimistic perspective, I believe that every day, there is a chance for restoration. After all, His mercies are new every morning. I hope and pray that you too, my dear friends, can find hope for tomorrow. Because joy truly does come in the morning. So let's keep living our lives for each morning of new mercies and joy and the light promised to come. We weren't made to do this all alone. So let's do this together. The presence of the Holy Spirit is life giving, so let's live this life as best as we can.
"Life is hard, but God's still good."
~Abby Lynn
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